


Kodzuken Reads Thrist Tweets

by applekenma



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Crack, Domestic Fluff, Editor Akaashi Keiji, Embarrassment, I always make KuroKen have some sort of calico cat for some reason, Kodzuken has some really thirsty fans, Kuroo Tetsurou is a Good Significant Other, M/M, Mentioned Bokuto Koutarou, Pro Gamer Kozume Kenma, This suddenly turns really fluffy for some reason, Youtube AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-29
Updated: 2020-09-29
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:14:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,568
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26702008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/applekenma/pseuds/applekenma
Summary: [Eng Sub] I read your guys’ Thirst Tweets (Minors, please stay away for your own safety, please)1M views • 3 hours agoKodzuken 11,092,303 subscribersShow lessI have gotten a lot of requests on Twitter to make a video of myself reading thirst Tweets. I know this is different from my regular videos, but a vast majority of people wanted this video, so here I am.orKenma reads his fan's thirst tweets but stops in the middle of filming just to admire his sleeping boyfriend, Kuroo.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji & Kozume Kenma, Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou
Comments: 33
Kudos: 379
Collections: My favorite haikyuu fics





	Kodzuken Reads Thrist Tweets

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this out pure boredom. I don't know what demonic being possessed me to write this, but I hope you enjoy it anyway!

“They want me to do _what_?” Kenma looked at Akaashi in disbelief. Kenma and Akaashi were currently sitting in a cafe, chatting about life and Kenma’s Youtube career, when Akaashi brought up something that almost made the Youtuber spit his coffee out.

“I said, your fans want you to make a video where you read their thirst tweets about you,” Akaashi said slowly, suppressing the urge to laugh in front of the older male. 

“But, why,” Kenma asked, not even wanting to know what his fans write about him on Twitter.

Akaashi shrugged and took a sip of his coffee, “Maybe you should make other content instead of gaming sometimes. Look,” Akaashi showed Kenma the hundreds of requests of video ideas for him to do sent by his subscribers.

Kenma sighed, not really knowing how to handle all of this, “Um, if that’s what they want, sure…” Kenma said after a while. 

“You know, you don’t have to do this if you don’t want to, “Akaashi said when he saw the anxious look on the Youtuber’s face.

“No, it’s okay,” Kenma looked at the raven-haired man, “I should try something new anyway,” Kenma said, not knowing how much he is going to regret it. 

“That’s good, Kenma,” Akaashi smiled at his friend, and Kenma hummed, giving his friend a nervous smile back.

* * *

**[Eng Sub] I read your guys’ Thirst Tweets (Minors, please stay away for your own safety, please)**

1M views • 3 hours ago

Kodzuken 11,092,303 subscribers

Show less 

I have gotten a lot of requests on Twitter to make a video of myself reading thirst Tweets. I know this is different from my regular videos, but a vast majority of people wanted this video, so here I am.

  
  
“Hey, guys, it’s Kodzuken, and I’m back with another video. Except, this time I’m not going to play video games all day like I usually do,” Kenma said as he looked into the camera, giving a small smile for his audience. 

“Since I’ve reached eleven million subscribers, I decided to do something special. I also want to thank you guys for sticking with me through the few years I’ve had this channel. I wouldn’t have gotten this far without you guys, I love you all a lot,” Kenma gave a soft smile to his audience.

“Anyways, as I said, I decided to do something different, “Kenma sighed before he said, “I’m going to read thirst tweets. Yeah, you’re probably wondering why I’m doing this. Well, everyone on Twitter wanted me to do this for my special, so that’s what I’m going to do in just in a minute.”

“Right here, my editor prepared a box full of papers that have your thirst tweets on it, and I’m going to read all of them.” Kenma shows his audience a cardboard box, on the front is said, “Thirst Tweets”. He sighed as he looked at the amount of paper that was in the box and looked back up the camera.

“This is probably going to traumatize me, but I’ll do anything for my subscribers.” Kenma smiled a bit in amusement.

“Anyways, let’s get the first one,” Kenma dug his hand into the cardboard box and pulled out a strip of paper.

**Mitsu-Kun @gluefucker123**

@Kodzuken Run me over with a fucking truck, light me on fire, skin me until I’m skinless, break all my bones, and I’d still say thank you :) #kenmathristtweets

_There’s even a fucking tag…?_

Kenma read out loud what was written on the piece of paper and rubbed his forehead like he was already tired with all of this and looked at the piece of paper in his hand in concern, “Um, actually, you’d probably be dead before you’d even have the chance to say thank you,” Kenma snorted softly and put the piece of paper before he moved on to the next one.

“I’m already regretting this whole thing, guys,” Kenma sighed as he got on with the next piece of paper.

**Kenma’s left nipple @kodzukensimp123**

Omggg, Kenma-kun is so fucking hot, what the actual fuck, like, fuck me, Daddy 😍😍 #kenmathirsttweets

Kenma blushed reading that out loud, but his fans had to know what was on the paper, so he had no choice. 

“Thank you, I guess…” Kenma said uncomfortably and averted his gaze at the camera, chucking the piece of paper on his desk, he reached in for the next one.

**The loose strand on Kenma-san’s forehead @nyanyangirl**

I would literally allow Kenma to choke me, just having his hands on me is enough to convince myself that my life was actually a meaningful one.

Kenma furrowed his eyebrows while reading the Tweet and looked at the camera with a frown.

“Don’t say that about yourself. Your life is very meaningful, but thank you for the compliment, I guess,” Kenma was about to reach in for the next one before his cat, Mikan, abruptly meowed loudly, slightly startling the male. He decided to ignore her before the calico cat jumped into his lap, disturbing his filming. He sighed and rolled his eyes softly, but patted the cat on her head before continuing.

“Anyways, the next one,” he pulled the next one out.

**Kenma’s ding-a-ling @friedchickenisgood**

@Kodzuken Jesus, Kenma’s just so sexy, I want to him to lick my [Cencored] and make me [Cencored]

“Jesus, Kenma’s just so sexy, I want to him to lick-” Kenma stopped and cringed as he saw the next few words out of his peripheral vision, “I’m not even going to finish reading that,” is all he said before chucking the piece of paper and digging for the next one. Mikan meowed in annoyance, wanting more attention from his owner.

“Mikan, you’re so greedy, just like Kuro,” he whispered to the cat with a playful glare before reading the next one.

**Akira @ihaveasadlife**

Kenma is so cool! His gaming tips have inspired me so much to learn more about video games and I love to obliviate my siblings in Fortnite! Thank you, Koduzken! ILYSM ❤️

Kenma smiled softly at the camera upon reading the Tweet.

“This one wasn’t weird at all. Thank you for your kind words and I’m glad you think my eyes are hot,” Kenma laughed softly while petting his needy cat. Maybe this wasn’t going so bad.

Oh, how wrong he was.

**You’re the Apple to my Pie @sadteenwhohasnothingtodo**

I was playing with my sister’s play-doh yesterday and molded it into Kenma’s dick and you know what I did next 😏

Kenma scratched his head with a worried look on his face as he read the Tweet.

“I can’t even fathom how uncomfortable this Tweet made me,” Kenma sighed, exasperated with all of these weird-ass comments. Kenma prayed to all the gods that were out there, that the next one wouldn’t be as weird as the last thirst tweet. 

I guess the gods listened to him this time because he stopped upon seeing the next Tweet.

**Kuroo 😼 @KenmasBoyfriend**

Hey, Babe! Just a daily reminder that you’re the best boyfriend ever, and I love you lots!! Also, congrats on 11 Million subscribers, you deserved it! You really deserve the whole world, though! ♥(ˆ⌣ˆԅ)

Kenma read the Tweet slowly. He stared at the paper in his hands for a few seconds before looking up at the camera, “Thanks, I love you too.” He wanted to say much, much more but, he couldn’t get too sappy on video. There was also a faint blush that blossomed on his cheeks and a soft look in his eyes. He gently put the piece of paper down and hesitantly dug into the rest of the papers. Now that he got that loving note from his boyfriend, he didn’t really want to look at any more thirst tweets, not wanting to ruin his happy mood. He decided to take a small break and paused his video. Gently taking his cat off of his lap and placing her on the floor, he unlocked the door of his gaming room and walked out to head towards his bedroom. He walked in to see Kuroo lying down on their bed, sleeping soundly. 

The Youtuber climbed onto their bed and laid down next to his boyfriend, softly stroking his Kuroo’s cheek with a content smile on his face. Kuroo grumbles slightly, and Kenma jerks back, worried he’s woken him up, but Kuroo only moves to tuck his head closer to Kenma’s chest, silently seeking out warmth. He smiles softly in his sleep, clinging to Kenma’s oversized sweatshirt, and Kenma thinks, _I would do anything to have this moment last forever._

He gently placed his hand on Kuroo’s chest and started tracing random patterns against it while taking in his boyfriend’s facial features. His hands travel up, cataloging what only he is allowed to see. The slight chap of his lips. The one small freckle that adorned his left cheek. The way his eyelashes flutter in his sleep.

The thought occurs to Kenma that watching someone while they sleep is probably kind of creepy. He can’t really bring himself to care. Kuroo probably won’t mind, he lives (or dies) for that sappy stuff.

The air in their bedroom is still and silent, broken only by Kuroo’s soft breaths and the quiet shiftings of being alive. Kenma continued the soft ministrations on Kuroo’s body until the latter suddenly groaned softly, his eyes fluttering open, making Kenma freeze.

Kuroo squinted as the sudden sunlight filled his eyes. He rubbed the sleep out of his eyes groggily. “Hm, Kenma? What’s up?” He wrapped his arms around the shorter man’s waist, tucking his head even further to Kenma’s chest.

“Nothing, I was just staring at you in your sleep.” Kenma snorted at the way the older male’s face turned into a slight grimace. 

“You’re creepy,” Kuroo mumbled, but there was a small smile that started to take over his lips. 

“Yeah, I know,” The Youtuber smiled as he placed his hand in his boyfriend’s unruly hair, softly scratching his fingernails through his hair, just the way he knows Kuroo likes it.

“How long were you even watching me,” Kuroo asked with a silly smile on his face, reaching up to play with a loose strand of Kenma’s hair.

“Mm, maybe twenty minutes, I don’t know,” Kenma lifted his shoulders in a half-shrug and stared at Kuroo’s honey brown eyes.

“What were you doing earlier?” Kuroo continued to bombard his boyfriend with questions, and Kenma sighed as he answered.

“I was filming a video for reaching eleven million yesterday.”

“Oh, yeah! Congrats on the accomplishment,” Kuroo kissed Kenma’s neck, making the latter laugh softly.

“Thanks, Kuro. I also saw that tweet you tweeted, and I think it was really sweet,” Kenma kissed the older male back on the cheek.

Kuroo blushed in mild embarrassment and looked at the love of his life through his whimsical eyelashes, “You think so? It was just a short little thing.”

Kenma shook his head and stopped his ministrations on Kuroo’s head, “Even if it was short, it really means a lot coming from you,” Kenma averted his gaze, trying to hide the smile that was trying to creep up his face with his sleeve.

“Aww, I love you lots, Kenma,” Kuroo said teasingly, but it was true, the male loved Kenma with all of his heart, and Kenma loved him back just as much.

“Love you, too,” Kenma murmured and didn’t care that he was wearing such a dopey smile on his face because whenever Kuroo gets cute like that, he couldn’t help it.

The two men continued to lay there, enjoying each other’s presence until Kuroo decided to break it, “Aren’t you going to go and film your video?”

The Youtuber groaned softly and looked down at his boyfriend with a bored expression, “Yeah, but maybe later, I don’t want to move.”

“Oh, okay, but where’s Mikan? I haven’t seen her all day.”

“She’s probably sleeping in the gaming room.”

“Ah, okay.”

“Anyways,” Kuroo hugged his boyfriend tighter, “I love you, Kenma,” Kuroo said for the millionth time that day. It was mandatory that he needed to remind Kenma how much he loved him.

The younger male sighed fondly and planted a tender kiss on his Kuroo’s cheek, “I love you more.”

“No, I do,” Kuroo furrowed his eyebrows like that was the dumbest thing someone has ever said.

“No, I do,” Kenma responded with a sly smirk, knowing that their playful banter is going to ensue.

“No, I do,” Kuroo replied again.

“No, I do.”

“Let’s just say we both love each other a lot, okay,” Kuroo chuckled and he closed his eyes once again, listening to his boyfriend’s heartbeat that was slowly starting to lull him back to sleep.

Kenma sighs as he continues to reply to the numerous emails he has in his inbox, typing madly onto his laptop. His cat had woken several minutes ago and now she was nuzzling Kenma’s leg, seeking attention. Kenma pets her head, satisfying the calico cat for now. 

Kuroo, who’s head was on Kenma’s other leg, starts whining in his ear like a toddler, “Pay attention to me!”

Kenma grunts.

“ _Ken-ma_!”

Kuroo and Mikan are very alike.

“Tetsu, just wait a minute,” Kenma says as he replies to comments on his Youtube video, getting annoyed by his attention-seeking children (Kenma’s a very stressed man). Kuroo sat up and leaned his body against Kenma’s arm, peering at the comments.

“Why are they only talking about our relationship,” Kuroo laughs loudly, startling the kitten who was starting to fall asleep.

Kenma gave Kuroo a short glare then looked down at his computer screen, “Probably because of that one tweet. Now everyone’s talking about it.”

Kuroo scoffed playfully, his head migrating to Kenma’s chest, “It’s not like they don’t know that we’re dating.”

“Yeah, but it’s kind of nice,” Kenma replied and smiled softly as he read through the comments on his Youtube video.

* * *

**[Eng Sub] I read your guys’ Thirst Tweets (Minors, please stay away for your own safety, please)**

1M views • 3 hours ago

Kodzuken 11,092,303 subscribers

Show less 

I have gotten a lot of requests on Twitter to make a video of myself reading thirst Tweets. I know this is different from my regular videos, but a vast majority of people wanted this video, so here I am.

  
**@applepieee** 57 minutes ago

Kenma and Kuroo are so cute together!! <3

> **@yuukipoo** 39 minutes ago
> 
> Ikr??! 

**@minorippe** 46 minutes ago

KuroKen Supremacy!! 😻😻😻 

> **@Bokuto_K**
> 
> say it louder for the people in the back 

**@mochicheeks** 33 minutes ago

When Kenma stares into the camera, I dieee lol (Love ya, Kenma-san!)

**@pinkupink** 30 minutes ago

QQ I will fight anyone who thinks Kenma is a mean person! He is the best! I'm so glad he made this video, it was really funny 😂❤️

**@applekenma** 11 minutes ago

KuroKen soulmates 😺♥️😺

> **@Bokuto_K** 9 minutes ago
> 
> SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK
> 
> **@katsuminyan** 8 minutes ago
> 
> KUROKEN SOULMATES Y'ALL
> 
> **@Kodzuken** a minute ago
> 
> @Bokuto stop
> 
> **@Bokuto_K** a few seconds ago
> 
> @Kodzuken I need to spread the KuroKen agenda, wdym?!

Kenma huffs out a soft laugh as he reads the latest comment on his video and looks at Kuroo fondly, who has fallen asleep on his chest, snoring softly. He gently places his hand in Kuroo's hair once again and starts messaging it softly, wanting this moment to last forever.

**Author's Note:**

> I have another story that I'm writing that is similar to this, so look out for that.  
> Anyways, I really hope you guys enjoyed this silly fic! (I love how this was so weird at the beginning, then it just turned into a pile of fluff lol)  
> Here's my [Twitter](https://twitter.com/applekenma) if you want to scream about KuroKen or just Haikyuu in general with me!


End file.
